11: The Life I Built- Still Building
Marriage didn’t fix me.
It wasn’t a clean ending or a magical resolution.
But it gave me something I hadn’t had in a long time—
A reason to keep becoming.
The day I married my wife, I wasn’t perfect.
I wasn’t fully healed.
But I was honest.
And that changed the way I showed up.
I started building.
From the ground up.
Not trying to go back to who I was—
But forward.
Toward who I was meant to be.
I started my own business.
Worked hard.
Made mistakes.
Learned.
I wasn’t the most talented.
But I was relentless.
Marketing became my language.
My craft.
Every campaign, every client, every late night at the desk was me
proving to myself that I could take what was broken and still build something strong.
And then—we had a baby on the way.
That changed everything again.
Because suddenly, my story wasn’t just mine.
It belonged to him.
And all the things I had carried—
the pain, the shame, the trauma—
I didn’t want to pass it on.
I wanted to be the man he could look at and say,
“That’s what strength looks like.”
Not perfection.
But presence.
Not a life without scars.
But a life where the scars meant something.
So I kept working.
Kept growing.
Kept healing.
And little by little, I stopped seeing myself as the kid who blew it.
I started seeing myself as the man who came back.
The man who chose to stay.
Who chose to feel.
Who chose to love.
The life I live now didn’t come easy.
Didn’t come quickly.
But I built it.
And for the first time in a very long time—
I know exactly who I am.
I hope this resonates with anyone who’s taken the time to read this. From here, I’ll start unpacking details on each chapter- things that deserved their own section to describe in detail.
I’ll share things I learned, things that helped, and the mental gymnastics I went through to get where I am today. It’s not pretty, but my hope is that I can help someone “skip the line” even just a little bit. It’s possible, and I think we can give you a faster track than the 10 or more years it took me.
One thing I saw a few years back that has always stuck in my head is this. “One day your story might become someone else’s survival guide.” That’s what has led me here. You’re not alone, I’m here. We can do this together.
Healing, listening.